dysthymia

the risk of trusting others, the risk of the betrayal that so often comes from giving unconditional trust, the risk of the loss of trust, of faith, of hope... it lingers, the pain of betrayal, deep to the core and just below the surface... i must find a way our of the darkness of despair, i must find my way out of this painful hopeless feeling... and day to day, keeping busy, i do... and at my core where i live, alone, i do, but the loss of trust, the feeling of not feeling safe in my living space, that is the mood these days outside and all around me... the best i can do, for now, is close my eyes and watch my world unfold before me...