magic moments

the last ten minutes (about) of it's a wonderful life floors me every time no matter how many times i've seen it... there are other films that grab me, hold me, melt me, and compel me to an emotional catharsis on different levels (wide range of types, from miracle on 34th st to fifth element to hook to some even more diverse), but few can kick me out of complacent egotism or detached intellectualism as well as it's a wonderful life...

thanks all who made it, every one :)

out of place euphoria

moods come and go so quickly sometimes that one or another can seem so out of place amidst the events and circumstances of the day (or night) as a day full of good fortune can see a few tears and a day full of misery can see a glimpse of euphoria, but when pure bliss is the base emotion upon which all others are draw, it is the most frequently out of place of all (and so therein least mentioned, aye?)...

bliss :)

i wasn't feeling this way

last month, or whenever this was, i was full of hope and prosper, as if prosper was something to be full of, and the bliss i know as me was shinging brightly in my eyes (even if i'm the only one who saw me)... or was it this month that i feel this way?... time travels in weird circles :)

bipolar

definitely euphoric depression, or is it the euphoric that is depressing because it is not shared... surely it isn't that the depression is euphoric... rhetoric, perhaps, but there are so many ways to view everything, how can a point be a line without another point to connect to...

sigh, when all that's left to do is alas, smile and enjoy the flow :)

bliss too

yes, the normal ordinary everyday mood between bits of cashews and milk chocolate is bliss, simple euphoric (and often effervescent) bliss...




what?... I didn’t say bliss was entertaining :)

top of the world

the softball world, at least... we won the first game of the season, lost the next one, won the third game, lost the fourth... then, today, we eight weeks later, we won our tenth game in a row and the last one was the championship game... we are the champions, my friends... went out celebrating, championship dinner, got trophies, t-shirts, awards, the league voted our team the spirit award and the team voted me mvp... ego flies, heart smiles, and and and...

it feels pretty amazing...

spinning into control

sometimes the mind focuses with such clarity that everything in the universe and beyond, known and unknown, makes perfect sense to me and if i ever find the words to explain it, i'll let you know... until then, excuse me if i just enjoy the heck out of the moments :)

bipolar

is usually defined as (or by) cycles of depression and elation or mania that often affects thinking, judgment, and social behavior in ways that may cause serious problems and embarrassment or grave problems... and statistics say 2.6 percent of the population aged 18 and older, have bipolar disorder... so maybe i ought to wonder, being that i have made some impulsive decisions that have undermined or even destroyed my fondest dreams and lead to rather horrible experiences at times and left me alone when being in a partnership is one of my fondest dreams, if i am not bipolar since i experience hyper highs that bounce me off the walls for days on end and dark deep depressions that have, at times, left me curled up in closets for days on end...

or i could just be a drama queen...

thing is, most of the time, i experience the seemingly perfect peace, joy, and happiness of super hyper giddy euphoric and the debilitating almost suicidal depression simultaneously... the depths of sadness i feel about being alone in this world amidst the seriously suicidal human species and the near perfect euphoria i feel just being alive is the constant state of being in my mind...

at least for the moment...

and sometimes i feel

life is a party and everything is so sweetly wonderfully enjoyable and pleasurable cuz there's some sort of balance that feels perfect...

roll with it :)

won der ful

wonderful news!... full of wonder, it's a win!... der win, to be european about it... ya, der ful o won!... and news too :)

good moods don't need much explaining ya know :)